How to Live Like a Gentleman: Lessons In Life, Manners, And Style by Sam Martin

Description: How to Live Like a Gentleman by Sam Martin Offering lessons in modern manners and style, How to Live Like a Gentleman is written by a man for men - and for the women in their lives. This handbook is filled with all the advice a regular guy needs to become a man of honor and decorum. FORMAT Paperback LANGUAGE English CONDITION Brand New Publisher Description Today, young men need etiquette guidance more than ever! And mens magazines such as Maxim and Esquire dont cover the array of potentially awkward moments. This little guide offers the last word on walking, talking, dressing, as well as:• shaking hands• tipping• tying a bow tie• small talk• fashion dos and donts Back Cover "A mans manners are a mirror in which he shows his portrait." --Johann Wolfgang von Goethe A mans place in todays world is a tricky one. More than ever, a man needs to know the right way to behave in every social situation and what it means to be a modern gentleman. This helpful handbook presents the classic manners and style that will turn the most socially inept male into a true gentleman. Walking and talking, meeting and greeting, wining and dining, How to Live Like a Gentleman is filled with all the practical advice a regular guy needs on what to wear and how to wear it, what to say, and how to act. Read it and become the man youve always wanted to be. Author Biography Sam Martin is the best-selling author of How to Mow the Lawn and How to Keep House. He has traveled widely and worked as a tree planter in Canada and as a senior editor at This Old House magazine. Sam is a modern gentleman. He lives in Austin, Texas, with his wife, Denise, and two sons, Ford and Wren. Table of Contents CONTENTS Introduction: Manners matterWhy manners?Self-confidenceSelf-respectAttitude and personal presencePutting the gentle back into the manTop ten qualities to nurture:Competence, Patience, Resolve, Respect, Self-assurance, Spirit, Diplomacy, Tact Chapter one: Stepping OutThe first impression – establishing your presence and introducing yourself to othersThe handshakeThe greetingThe hello kissWalking – how to carry yourself so that you make an impressionMeeting peopleSmall talk and conversation skillsIntroducing people to othersDiction and eloquenceSpeak up – speaking clearly in all situationsCultivating vocabulary without swallowing a dictionaryPublic speakingLessons in listeningCommanding respect through the words you useHow to speak to the authorities: what to say, what not to sayPhone, email and online etiquette Cell phones Call waiting Netiquette Beepers Chapter two: Hygiene, Grooming, and DressPersonal hygiene – You might not need a range of skincare products but you do need to shower every dayHow to shave: what to do if you cut yourselfHow to iron: shirt, trousersYour image – the importance of developing your own styleDressing for respectThe perfect wardrobe for winter, spring, summer, fallEssential stylish items that will last a lifetimeFashion dos and donts from head to toe Chapter three: Eating and DrinkingTable manners Elbows on or off the table How to use a napkin Eating and talking, do they mix? Must you wait until everyone is serves or let your food get cold?Being on time Out on the town: How to order in a restaurant Sending food back Which fork? Glassware – stem or bulb, where to hold? Food masterclass: Sushi, soup, spaghettiSelecting wine Tasting wine How to send it back if it is vinegaryHow to give a toast What to do if youve drunk too muchSmoking cigarettes – when its cool, when it isntSplitting the bill, stress free Being the perfect host: So youre throwing a party – what now? Supplies to keep around – food, drink, glassware, dishes, cookwareCleanliness is Manliness: Home appearance – interior, hiring a maid serviceHow to set the table for a dinner party – styling tipsYour signature cocktailHow to open a bottle of wine/champagneHow to tie a bowtieSending invitationsWhat to do when you receive a gift you dont likeWriting thank you notes Being the perfect guest: How to receive an invitation What to take – great gift ideas for all occasions and people of all ages Invited to dinner – how to be the perfect dinner guest Being a great party guestSaying thank you: with cards, email, phone calls Chapter four: The Fairer SexHow to woo with flairHow to ask a woman out on a dateHow to say noHow to hear noHow to pay a complimentDoor etiquette (not only for the woman you are dating)Romantic dinners for twoWhen to call someone you likeWhen to kiss her, when not to kiss herBirth control – a gentlemans responsibilityHow to behave (or not) in bedThe morning afterRemembering datesPresents – when to give them and what to giveHome attire – living alone, with a womanGetting engaged – asking her father, getting a ringMeeting your girlfriends/wifes parentsPregnancyHow to behave when your wife tells you shes pregnantHow to behave when your girlfriend tells you shes pregnant Chapter five: Men at WorkThe job interviewWhat to wear to the officeElevator etiquetteHow to be successful at a business meetingThe holiday party – what to wear, who to talk to, what to sayDating at the office – to do it or not to do itEmail etiquetteBusiness phone etiquetteWork speak and speaking at workGiving the perfect presentationThe business lunch Chapter six: Gentleman at LargeThe bachelor party Best Man etiquette Good sportsmanship How to watch sports well with others How to know when enough beer is enoughHow to drive in traffic to avoid getting road rageWhat to wear on an airplaneHow much luggage to bringHow to act in a foreign countryWhat to do on crowded subway carsTechnology – the etiquette of never switching off from the office, the Playstation, etc.The new etiquette Gym etiquette and more Conclusion Long Description Today, young men need etiquette guidance more than ever! And mens magazines such as Maxim and Esquire dont cover the array of potentially awkward moments. This little guide offers the last word on walking, talking, dressing, as well as:* shaking hands* tipping* tying a bow tie* small talk* fashion dos and donts Excerpt from Book SAMPLE TEXT Chapter 1: Stepping Out Looking sharp is a big part of living like a gentleman but its not rule number one. The first thing you need to know is how to act like a man. Without a good handshake, solid posture and eloquent conversation skills you can wear the sharpest suit money can buy but youll be wearing it alone. Knowing how to handle your social responsibilities with aplomb, on the other hand, will get you as far as you want to go. The first impressionEvery dating service, career coach and image consultant on the planet agrees: how you first establish yourself with others is the key to any relationship. In fact, most say that presenting a good first impression is the single most important thing you can do. Conversely, bad first impressions will doom a job interview or blind date before it even gets started. Some say people can make conclusive judgements about a person within seconds of first meeting them. However long it takes for someone to check you out for the first time, just dont give them any easy targets. For starters, know how to introduce yourself. The handshakeGetting a grip on how you present yourself to others starts with giving a good grip. In fact, a good firm handshake may be the most important impression you leave with someone. Its appropriate to shake both men and womens hands upon first encounters, especially business encounters. Absent Father - How to Give a Good Grip1. Be close enough to the person whose hand you want to shake so that you can stand up straight and comfortably extend your hand without having to lean over. 2. Extend your entire hand out to the person and look them in the eye. 3. While continuing to look them in the eye, squeeze their hand, palm to palm with a firm grasp. 4. If you feel comfortable doing it, shake the hand up and down at least once but not more than three times and then let go. Its perfectly acceptable to give a firm grip for a couple of seconds and let go without any pumping action. 5. While youre shaking and making eye contact, be sure and smile and give a good positive greeting What Not to Do1. Dont squeeze someones hand so hard that you crush it. Rather than coming off as strong and determined, it leaves the impression of a lack of confidence. 2. Another no-no is grabbing someones hand and pulling it towards you. Its controlling and overbearing and might alienate your new acquaintance. 3. Enveloping a handshake by putting your free hand on top of the other persons hand during a handshake is good if youre seeing an old friend but not okay when meeting someone for the first time. Its too personal and some men will be put off by it.2. There are a few styles of shakes that will doom you from the get go. One is the limp shake by which you just hold out your hand but dont squeeze. If youre on the giving end, this feels similar to firmly grabbing a flabby, lifeless tenderloin steak. Its unpleasant, to say the least.3. Dont hold out your hand lazily. Chances are youll get your fingers crushed. Not only does this hurt, its wimpy. 4. The most infamous bad shake is the dead fish or the clammy hand. This is a combination of the limp shake and the sweaty palm. If your hand is wet - either from nervousness or from holding a cold drink - dry it before greeting. The greetingHow to say hello to new acquaintances and colleagues will often depend on the circumstance. Going on a job interview or business trip is going to be different than greeting someone who has come over for dinner at your house. For the former you might want to say something like "Hello, my name is Sam Martin. Im with ABC company." In more casual environments, no ones going to be interested in your job - at least not right away. For any occasion, nothing beats a genuine smile and solid eye contact. If youre stressed or angry and you let that show through on your face, others will pick up on it and feel as though theyre not welcome. For that matter, letting your eyes wander around the room or look over a persons shoulder might give the impression that youre waiting for someone more interesting to arrive. A gentleman will want his new acquaintances to think he is pleased to meet them and genuinely happy to have them around. A simple greeting is best. Stand up when you meet someone new, give them a good smile, a firm handshake and say who you are immediately. If you walk into a room, dont stand around waiting. Approach the others and make your introduction. What to say when.After you say "hello" or "hi" and give your first and last name, here are a few scenarios and suggestions of what you can say. In almost any situation: "Pleasure to meet you" or "Nice to meet you." At a job interview: "Thanks for your time." or "Ive been looking forward to our meeting."New friends coming over for dinner: "Glad you could make it." or "Welcome."On a blind date: "Thanks for meeting me." or "You look great." The Hello KissNot everyone gets a hello kiss and those that do usually arent expecting a smacker on the lips. A cheek to cheek kiss in the air or a small peck on the jaw is the appropriate approach to this most European of greetings thats usually reserved for more familiar friends. That said, if youre in Europe - Paris especially - dont wince or pull away when greeted by a total stranger with a cheek kiss. When in Rome do as the Romans do. The same can be said closer to home. If a lady friend or acquaintance makes the move for a hello kiss, give her your best one. This isnt a sensual event. Its a gentlemanly skill that will give you an added air of confidence and sophistication. Walking and postureThe language of the body is as important as what you say. Many a snap judgement has been made after seeing a guy slouch in his chair at dinner or shuffle his feet through the office door. A gentleman should always keep his back straight, his shoulders back and his chin up. Those engaging in the occasional sparring match should do just the opposite. Walking too will reveal a sense of self worth and importance. If you want to make an impression when entering a room, keep you eyes up and move with purpose towards your destination. Meeting people Men who walk into a room with purpose and greet others with bright eyes and a firm handshake wont have a problem meeting people. Unless they stop there. Those with energetic greetings need to have polished conversation skills to walk the talk. Small Talk Small talk is oft criticized for being trite and insincere but one has to start somewhere. Launching immediately into an exposition of The Pelopensian War will more likely dim anothers interest rather than pique it. Wait for cocktails on that one. At first, engage in a little get to know you exchange. Ask questions like "how do you know the host?", "do you have plans for the holidays?", "how was your vacation?" and "did you grow up around here?" Usually, the answers you get and give will lead to more. Listen carefully so you can pick up on these entrees into more in depth conversation. If nothing strikes you, the best way to ensure an ongoing, vibrant conversation is to keep asking questions. Just avoid dead end queries that can be answered in "yes" or "no." People love talking about themselves. A gentleman should never spend too much time talking about himself. What Not to Ask or Conversation Killers"Hows your ex?""Do you have plans for Christmas?" (Not everyone celebrates Christmas.)"Do you dye your hair?""Whens your due date?" (What if theyre not pregnant?)"I found a hair in my soup." "I hate coming to these things, dont you?" Introducing people to othersOften gentlemen will travel in numbers. If youre in the know and the rest of your posse is in the dark, its up to you to bring them into the fold. At parties youll want to introduce friends to the host and other important people. At business gatherings, seek out the decision makers. When presenting a friend, first say the name of the person youre meeting followed by your introduction. The exchange might go something like this: "Ed, Id like you to meet a friend/business associate/(fill in the blank) of mine, John Smith." If you know the two share a common interest or goal its completely appropriate and encouraged to make that connection for them. "John just got back from a cycling trip in the Pyranees," you might say. "Ed does a lot of cycling himself." You know youve done a good job if you find yourself excluded from the conversation, leaving you free to peel off and meet knew people of your own. Diction and eloquenceSmall talk and social conversation skills are one thing but a well polished gentleman should also know how to take it to the next level Going mano a mano with the most accomplished speakers requires a facility with language that includes a good vocabulary and does not include "um," "like," or "whatever." To command respect in the board room or in front of a packed house is the hallmark of a man who is going places. Speaking ClearlyNothing eloquent will spring from a mans mouth unless he can speak clearly and loud enough for others to hear. One doesnt need a background in theatre to get to this level but the notion of projecting the voice like an actor can be helpful. Dont mumble. Keep your hand away from your mouth when you speak. If youre in front of a large audience, speak to the person in the back row to ensure your voice is loud enough. VocabularyWhen youre speaking clearly, choose your words carefully and use a sophisticated vocabulary to reveal the finer points of what you say. Anyone who can articulate an idea with a good vocabulary commands respect by showing a deeper understanding of the subject and efficiency with the language. It allows them to get their message across more effectively. Plus, if youre listening to others talk you dont want to get caught flat footed with a word you dont know. For those starting out with a limited supply of wo Details ISBN1599213516 Author Sam Martin Short Title HT LIVE LIKE GENTLEMAN Pages 128 Language English ISBN-10 1599213516 ISBN-13 9781599213514 Media Book Format Paperback DEWEY 395 Illustrations Yes Year 2008 Imprint The Lyons Press Place of Publication Guilford Country of Publication United States Subtitle Lessons In Life, Manners, And Style DOI 10.1604/9781599213514 UK Release Date 2008-03-01 AU Release Date 2008-03-01 NZ Release Date 2008-03-01 US Release Date 2008-03-01 Publisher Rowman & Littlefield Publication Date 2008-03-01 Audience General We've got this At The Nile, if you're looking for it, we've got it. With fast shipping, low prices, friendly service and well over a million items - you're bound to find what you want, at a price you'll love! TheNile_Item_ID:137157768;

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